inbox;

[depreciated]

Inbox

video ⬤ audio ⬤ text ⬤ delivery

soubi agatsuma ⬤ loveless
residential district ⬤ text
moonblessing ⬤ cordis

info ⬤ permissions ⬤ kinklist

Comments

happy cordis moon, soubi 🎉

[machiavel]

[ seimei feels—frazzled? yes. frazzled might be the word for it. he’s already been through the cordis moon before, but this is the first time he’s had to suffer through it with someone else in such close quarters.

it throws off his sleeping simply because of the unfamiliarity of it, and he wonders if it’s going to be like this every time. if, maybe, it’s worse because soubi is here. ]

…

[ soubi is probably going to be woken up by the sound of seimei intermittently doing all of the following: looking through the cabinets for something to eat, loudly tapping his device to play an app game, and opening and closing the windows as if unable to get both a good temperature and fresh air.

he isn’t usually so restless, so lacking in composure, but cordis has him antsy. ]

:(

[depreciated]

[Soubi had looked into what the cordis moon was going to be like and after all he had gone through, he hadn't thought it would be bad.

And he had been wrong.

Soubi only sleeps for a few hours at a time if he's lucky and he was bordering on being awake when Seimei wakes him up. By how restless he's behaving, Soubi knows he should be going out there and asking if Seimei wants anything. By how hungry Soubi feels, he can imagine it's all the worst for the other. He should probably go and get Seimei food. He's gotten some money and then he can make himself something.

When he gets to the door, he feels a bit anxious and then there's that familiar feeling of a tail twitching back and forth and Soubi's eyes widen, hand grasping behind to feel for the bushy tail and then hands going to the top to feel the ears.

He's practically panicking, trying to calm himself down. They aren't real. He had been told about this part but he had not been expecting his own ears and tail anymore. It's through this panic, he jumps when he hears Seimei shut a cabinet so loudly it seems like he slammed it or maybe it only seems that way. It's his training that makes him run out and forget about his own blind panic.

And then he's in a mess of pheromones and this isn't any better. He's standing there awkwardly, stumbling over words before he finally chokes out Seimei's name.]

Do you need...anything?

[machiavel]

[ as soon as he hears soubi leave his room, seimei puts back on his best controlled image as he drops back down onto the floor from climbing onto the counter. ]

Soubi.

[ he says, without turning around, and when he does—his ears perk up. for a moment, his interest is caught. ]

I’m a little hungry.

[ soubi looks different with his ears, though seimei realizes at the same time that he seems quite familiar. he looks younger. they could be mistaken for classmates, with that vulnerable expression on his face. ]

[depreciated]

[The ears flatten to his head and he nods. This feels familiar. Whenever Ritsu had told him to do something or said anything that was not directly an order but only implied, Soubi could remember this exact stance. He remembers how his ears would do this and the tail swishes back and forth like he can't control it and he needs to remember how to do so.

But he definitely does not want to look at himself.]

I will pick you up chips. I have the money for it. Is there anything else? [He definitely does not want to leave this apartment or have anybody see him but well, what Seimei wants is what he gets.]

[machiavel]

I want more than that.

[ and seimei will get more, but now he’s attached to something else. soubi can’t leave yet, not until seimei has had his fill of terrorizing him in here. ]

Did you get taller overnight? You look different.

[ it’s kind of ridiculous, seimei thinks. his own cordis transformation has been kind to him—he can feel butterfly wings trying to grow, but he thinks they won’t sprout until tomorrow. ]

Ah, no. You cut your hair.

he’s baaack

[machiavel]

[ seimei has met a lot of people through his newfound hobby—and, okay, outside of it too. his social life is booming, but as a result, he hasn’t been able to keep an eye on soubi as much as he would like to, normally. he hopes soubi doesn’t need the reminder. this does not stop him from delivering it.

for truly no good reason except to be a bother, seimei texts soubi from the living room. ]

Come here.

eternal :(

[depreciated]

[Soubi was in the middle of a piece when he got the text. He should finish what he's doing but he's immediately getting up and going to Seimei. Hair messily tied back, paint under his nails, he goes to Seimei and stands in front of him.]

What can I do for you?

:)

[machiavel]

Play a game with me.

[ that is not the purpose of all this and soubi should know that, but seimei gestures to their TV, and the honestly older-looking console that has been set up underneath it. even for lunatia’s distinct aesthetic, this seems a little outdated—because it is. seimei can’t afford the newest models. ]

I’ve been so busy, I’ve hardly seen you.

[depreciated]

Okay. [Soubi isn't very good at these things. Most times he had only watched Seimei but it doesn't matter. It isn't about a game anyway. Soubi knows there's something else that he wants.

He sits in the seat farthest from Seimei, not wanting to be near Seimei for Seimei's sake. He probably smells like paint anyway.]

What kind of game?

[machiavel]

[ he does smell like paint. there’s nothing to do about that, though, so seimei ignores it.

passing soubi a controller, he loads the lone cartridge he’s bought. ]

It’s a little like Mario. [ ritsuka liked it, so he got it, even if he finds it kind of dry. it makes him feel closer to his brother now. ] Jump on the enemies, reach the goal. That sort of thing.

here we are, once again ( nsfw )

[machiavel]

[ something has happened that’s different from anything the moons have yet brought upon him. he’s used to, by now, feeling itchy and restless when the cordis moon hangs overhead, and he didn’t think that he was going to be so badly damaged by that announcement from the dragon king. it’s his natural hubris at work—seimei has always believed that if he doesn’t want something to happen, it won’t. if it does, he can fix it.

that’s how he’s gotten himself into this situation, a couple days into the appearance of the rune behind his ear. he’s unusually locked himself in his room after an incident when this began, but refusing himself either contact or relief in such close quarters with someone he has similarly refused to acknowledge is backfiring. ]

…

[ he’s hot, he can’t think straight, he feels ill. whatever is wracking his body must be a sickness, but every time he tries to press his hand to the sheets or to the frame of his bed to try to cool himself off, he finds himself thinking about soubi. it should be infuriating. he can’t muster anger. ]

Soubi.

[ he has to give in. he knows soubi can hear him. he grits his teeth, then calls for soubi out loud the way he’s called for nisei through their bond. thanks to ostella, it’s naturally specifically attuned to get soubi’s attention anyway. ]

Soubi.

torn into pieces....

[depreciated]

[Soubi had worried. Since his arrival, he had seen how this world could affect people. The Cordis moon had turned both of them into something not quite themselves but this is different. This is very different.

The scent during Cordis is bad enough but he can handle it. Whatever is going on right now is only made worse by Seimei but he's terrified of leaving his room. The thoughts racing through him go against everything he was ever taught and he doesn't know what to do.

By the time Seimei is calling him, Soubi was on the brink of it all. It's a combination of his training, to do whatever Seimei needs of him, and these instincts. He knows it'll end up in a mistake but he cannot ignore him. As calmly as he can, he goes to Seimei and opens the door. A deep inhale and he grips the door. Everything inside tells him to just take him and it's those instincts that make him go to Seimei, closer than he would like. His fingers dig into the sheets and he's already hard. What has this world done to him?]

[machiavel]

[ seimei could cry, he’s so frustrated, but the thought alone is enough to shame him out of it. instead, as soon as soubi comes to him, his bed, he reaches out to grip soubi’s thigh. it doesn’t seem to occur to him that he hates touch, right now.

his face is flushed, his expression unusually vulnerable. he’s been cracked open by this horrible blight. ]

I can’t stand it.

[ he wants nisei. he doesn’t want to show this side of himself to soubi. ]

Soubi, it hurts. [ it’s like his mouth has completely detached itself from his mind. ] No matter what I do, my body…

[depreciated]

[It's bizarre to see Seimei like this. Never before has he seen Seimei so vulnerable. Even in his worst moments, Seimei had the ability to look calm throughout it all. This is not Seimei but Soubi also knows this isn't quite him either.

He takes his glasses off because although there are two voices telling him different things inside, it feels inevitable that he loses all restraint and does what his instincts tell him to do. There's a shudder as Soubi reminds himself this isn't his place but it's truly a losing battle as he puts his mouth at Seimei's neck and kisses him there. He's sure that someone without his training for control would be losing it by now but even this is embarrassing. How he presses those open kisses at Seimei's neck, puts his hand on Seimei's hip.]

This isn't easy for me either. You're not making it easy. [Though that's often how it goes as he fully settles himself over Seimei now, not yet straddling him as he kisses him and moves his hands over his chest.]

[machiavel]

[ seimei wants to hate it.

there’s a part of him which remains himself that wants to claw soubi’s throat out for thinking that he can do this. most of him, though, falls to it so easily that he wouldn’t say no if someone offered him death right now. ]

Soubi…

[ he knows that soubi has kissed ritsuka. it feels insane to him that he’s jealous. this strange mark has him wanting soubi’s attention all to himself, and he digs his fingers into soubi’s shirt as if he can keep him there.

the violence left in seimei expresses itself through his kiss. then, panting— ]

You can have me.

[ he’s so addled he hardly considers his ears, in making the offer. ]

your inbox is just the seimei zone

[machiavel]

[ seimei really thought he had cordis figured out. honestly, he did. his transformations weren’t always the same, but he could understand and anticipate his changes in mood and needs—he would eat more, and more willingly, and the craving for touch and chroma would hover at a level he never thought possible for someone like himself. all those, however, have been manageable in their predictability.

this is different.

it starts unpleasantly early, around six in the morning. seimei wakes up fully underneath his bedsheets, and there’s really no way he could ever explain to someone the feeling of being small and trapped under something that has never seemed so heavy before. he struggles to get out, and even when he does, he’s still partially sure that he’s dreaming.

awkwardly hopping off the bed, however, his world continues to feel quite stable and real. nothing seems out of the ordinary, and he can read all the text in his room. he stares up at his door, and thankfully, slamming a paw against the sensory lock is enough to open it up. ]

…

[ lacking another idea, he meows. ]

gonna rename this post "seimei's place"

[depreciated]

[Cordis has basically stayed the same for Soubi. He had seen and learned it could be different. If anything, he wished for any other animal traits.

It's a good thing he sleeps so little but especially when Cordis begins, Soubi goes out his away to make sure he's up as early as possible. By the time Seimei is meowing, Soubi is awake and dreading Cordis. After the last month, he's worked hard to avoid any potential ire from Seimei although he thinks they both want to forget anything happened.

The meow, though, is unexpected. He had been thinking about what to do about breakfast. Seimei liked his classics and Soubi knows he should stick to those. There's a pit in his stomach as he gets up to go to Seimei's door. As nervous as he is about this, it's weird to hear that meow. Knocking, he calls out.]

Seimei?

[He won't open the door. There's no permission in doing that.]

[machiavel]

[ seimei needs soubi to open the door. he doesn’t know how to communicate that he needs soubi to open the door. after last month, suffering one humiliation after another, he had hoped to take this one on with dignity.

lacking the opportunity for that, he meows again, and paws audibly at the door. it’s unlocked, but he can’t get the handle. ]

…mrrrrrow.

[depreciated]

[He isn't given permission but the meow is strange, right? Soubi thinks it over for a only a moment. Seimei would have said something by now. He's sure. But the fact he's hearing a cat isn't normal.

Maybe it isn't what he's supposed to do but when he tries to open Seimei's door, finding it unlocked, he pokes his head in.

And upon seeing a cat and no Seimei, he frowns. Seimei wouldn't have gotten a pet. He had heard about extreme animal transformations...]

Seimei...?

[machiavel]

[ seimei doesn’t even have the power to nod like this. he’s just a cat, and although he hasn’t yet seen himself, his own warmth suggests that he’s a pretty fluffy one. ]

…

[ not knowing what else to do, he flexes his paws to show soubi his little claws. this is what he has going for him. ]

[machiavel]

[ seimei has had quite a lot on his mind since that trip into the future. his ears had been missing. it was hard for him to fathom that ever truly coming to pass… or it would have been hard, but he’s here, in this world that seems so intent on forcing them into intimate positions.

he looks at himself in the mirror every now and then, pressing his hand down and back across his ears just to get an idea of that look again. he isn’t sure what the feeling inside him is, when he sees himself that way. this is another such situation, but this time— ]

Soubi.

[ seimei’s tail lashes, and he steps out of the bathroom. ]

[depreciated]

[Soubi had noticed how busy Seimei had been in his thoughts. Seimei was always thinking, scheming some might say, but Soubi liked to believe he knew when Seimei was doing that or just had a lot on his mind. That was a side effect of living here, your thoughts were always racing.

But it didn't necessarily mean that Soubi wanted to know what was on Seimei's mind. There were plenty of reasons that it wouldn't be any good for him.]

Yes? [He had been putting away some vegetables he had been cutting up for a curry he wanted to make tomorrow but that stops. Seimei deserves his entire attention after all.]

[machiavel]

Are you really going to be the one to take my ears?

[ seimei posits the question like it’s something they’ve ever discussed previously. they haven’t, not really. that strange look a decade into the future gave them information, but seimei is sure it was to be understood as a delusion rather than a prediction.

and yet. ]

I can’t believe that.

[depreciated]

[For all of Soubi's acting skills, there's little signs that give him away. Especially around somebody as powerful like Seimei. His face remains passive and calm, no emotion betraying the bolt of anxiety that rises up within him. His hand twitches, his fingers flex, and it's small but it's something.]

Your ears were gone but that doesn't mean that it was me. That you would allow that. [Even if for the time they have been here, their relationship has taken a turn Soubi never would have seen coming. Never did he think he would know what it was like to kiss Seimei and know what he looked like when he had an orgasm. He tried not to think about it.]

If that illusion was real, if that was our future, it may not have been me at all.

[machiavel]

[ it was soubi. seimei knows this with certainty because it makes him sick to think about when his mind is clear. during cordis, all bets are off, they’ve long agreed to that—but the thought that there really is a point in his future where he gives up makes his stomach churn.

so he needs to take back control. whatever happened to that other seimei was the result of giving in. this, now, is all seimei’s choice. ]

Are you saying that to comfort me… or to comfort yourself?